Undergraduate Kitchen Misadventures or, why I don't have a future in the culinary arts

Now Playing: Garbage - Run Baby Run

I've been trying my hand in the kitchen for the past week or so - and surprisingly, the United Nations has not come a-knockin' at my door to accuse me of creating weapons of mass destruction. You think the billowing black smoke, noxious fumes and screaming civilians would tip someone off, but no - I've been left to brew my broths in peace. (Stir in the witches' spiel from Macbeth, with cackling to taste)

So here's what I've been serving up lately:

• Pasta with seafood sauce (marinara sauce, if you want to get all fancy on me) - this actually came out pretty well, even according to my mother. To be entirely fair, she only said it was good after i went, "how is it how is it tell me tell me its good right don't be mean tell me its good how is it how is it?" ad nauseum ad infinitum.
  
• Pancakes. with blueberries. Yes, I realise it's fairly conventional to add bits of fruit or whatever to pancake mix, but I just discovered this, so humour me, okay? :P
• Beef in black bean sauce - okay, I can't do Chinese food. At all. This was a total unmitigated disaster - a horrible charred mess. The beef took too long to cook, then it charred, and then the gravy disappeared and I was left standing in the shambles that was my kitchen with a smoke alarm going off. I shall stick to restaurant-made chinese food from now on - much easier that way. This week's experiment... Failure. (Anyone gets that reference, you get a blended hot chocolate from Second Cup, my treat :D)
  

Hey, even Nigella Lawson had to start somewhere, right? right?

Hem has decided to quit blogging (again!) - so mourn the passing of one of the better blogs on the block.

And that's it for me. Ta.